Here he sits in front of me and my sister, on his 82nd birthday. He tells us that he is weak today and has alot of pain in his heart. We want to take him out for lunch and celebrate him, but he can't leave our mother. "She can't leave the house today and I want to stay with her," he says with concern. We listen to him as he shares the same stories we have heard countless times before about his father. My dad looked like a litle boy, angry and afraid as these familiar thoughts of the past spill out of him. We don't stop him today.

"We want to hear you Dad. Let it come out, We hear you".

He begins to loop into the same angry thoughts that keep him hurting and recreating the pain.

"All I wanted was to be seen and valued," he cried. "I never heard it from my father, not once."

In this intimate moment, I felt the presence of my Grampa's spirit.

"Tell him now Dad. Grampa's right here in spirit. Let go of the pain that is locked up in your heart."

He cried, he looked into my eyes holding back his pain.

Colleen speaks now in a strong and authoritative voice, "listen to Frannie, Dad, let her help you."

His eyes are locked into mine as I feel his resistance. I hold him with my heart. Then the tears began to flow as he yells out his pain to his father.

The German words of my Grandfather's love moved through my heart like a jolt of light. "Ich libe dich my son Phillip, Ich libe dich". I love you."

"I needed to do this," my father spoke now in almost a whisper.

His breath was deeper as he put his hands on his heart and in gratitude of the moment he said, "I don't feel the pain in my heart anymore."

My father softened as he let go and allowed forgiveness into his heart. The freedom felt because he let go and allowed my Grandfather's love into his heart.

After that day it seemed that my father was stronger in many ways. His loving heart, even though it had been severely damaged from a heart attack and stroke, was more fully alive and expressive. Instead of hearing my father complain about how hard it was to be here and he was only here to take care of my mother, I heard his dreams come alive again. "If I'm going to live longer now, maybe I will get my eyes lazered so that I could read again." There was a strength within him that I hadn't heard for awhile.

Now a month later my parents are back in Ontario after spending 5 months with me here in Florida. I received a call at 12:30 in the early morning, from my sister crying on the other end of the phone, "Dad just had another stroke. He is paralyzed and cannot hear or speak." My mind is whirling, my body feels tight and I feel afraid. We pray for the highest good for our father that night.

I toss and turn all night as thoughts and memories pour through me as I feel I am held in light. I pray for peace. I pray for my Dad knowing that he has fought this battle many times. We call him a Miracle man because against all odds he seems to pull through. He may be weaker in body and disabled in physical ways but his heart becomes stronger in the authority of his spirit. A gentle loving man continues to unveil. Once upon a time he was physically the strongest man I knew and now his strength is within.

I want peace. I take myself to the beach to be alone with myself. To join with nature.

A place of remembering what is real. I give myself permission just to be with all of me. As my walk becomes mindful and full of presence, I feel this sacred moment of aliveness. I look around at the beauty of nature as I witness it's way.

I praise you Great spirit. I bow to you, my beloved teacher, friend. I breathe this life giving energy into every cell of my body.

This moment becomes so still within me as I watch a Crane standing in it's magnificent statue like appearance. It watches me as I gaze into it's eyes. It's stillness brings me to being even more present.

All of a sudden I could receive everything around me. It was as if the waves of the Gulf were speaking and leading me to silence. I began to notice the different birds where as before I only saw sea gulls. The sky was wrapped around me like a crystal clear shawl. Nature praises and rejoices God's creation. I was filled with peace. I was smiling inside and a quiet filled me up as if I were drinking in the nectar of the most delicious liquid.

Out of the corner of my eye something caught my attention. Something colorful was floating in the water. I waded into the water and picked it up. There in my hand was a beautiful woven bracelet of many colors. I looked to see if anyone was around that might have owned it. In gratitude I felt it was for me. I tied it on my wrist and as I turned it around, in the center was the peace symbol. "Ask and you will receive". I did ask and I received.

My father is recovering again. He said he saw heaven. He is not ready to go yet, I guess? Heaven can wait. Dad has more to do here.

A few days later, my sister held the phone for my father as our mother spoke to him, "Phil, I love you so very much." With tears rolling down his cheek, he replied, "I can't hear you with my ears but my heart hears your love. I love you so very much". Mom received what she longed to hear and feel with her heart.

As peace was given, this day became an offering of the gift of praise.

Thank you Dad for trusting in life that is here for you. I bow to you my teacher, my friend, my father on earth. I am grateful to know the divine within you and that which is in all of us.

Thank you God for our Fathers who gave us life and now we can fully allow it in. Happy Father's Day for all these great men in our lives

Love and blessings,
Frannie